(return to Essay of the Month main page)

Over Time
by Amanda Toro

Grade 10
Prompt Code: S10A
IST: Christine Stewart
Evaluator: Heather
(read the Evaluator's Comment and Connections)

****************************************

             Every year, I’m asked to write a paper about my writing process, and each year it includes the same overall ideas.  I’ve noticed that over time, while the outline stays the same, my process does change slightly.  While my strengths and weaknesses appear generally the same each year, I can make a few changes, which are found mostly in my vocabulary.
            I first like to start with the title of my prompt.  This helps me, personally, to keep things organized and accordant to one main theme.  My first paragraph introduces what I’m going to be writing about.  Depending on the kind of paper I am writing, the next two or three paragraphs go through what I explained in the introduction, yet more in detail.
            As for my writing strengths, I have not so much expanded them as strengthened the ones that I already have.  These strengths include being a good typist, which can help me to have a well-typed paper and make the process flow at a quicker speed.  I also have a good imagination; this is good for papers that include fictional characters and settings.  I have noticed that I do better with fictional pieces.  Also, while vocabulary used to be a weak point, I now have a broader vocabulary.  This can make a paper more interesting by allowing less room for repetition.
            My weaknesses are problems with punctuation and grammar.  These problems can make a paper look sloppy and not well written.  Even though modern technology allows me the ability to simply press a button and fix some mistakes, it is still a major issue that I will keep working on, to make myself a better writer without the help of a machine.  Another problem is that I put my writing off till it must be done.  While I love writing, I find myself leaving it aside for much longer than I should.  I would like to fix this and start my papers sooner, so that I can take more time and get a more thought-out, overall well-finished paper.
            After I have written my first draft, I go back and read it over to check for problems, such as punctuation.  I also look for sentences or phrases that may cause confusion for the reader.  At times I might even have a family member read it to see how well they can understand it, and to see if they notice anything that does not look right.  Having another reader gives me a better understanding of how to relate what I feel to others.
            I’ve learned that my papers seem to take a different approach to things than most other writers.  I would like to keep my individuality and at the same time improve the weak points, like punctuation, so that my readers can comprehend things better.  I will also take more time this year and in the future years to work on my papers, so that I can put in more details and explanations that make it easier for the reader to understand.  I have made and will, more than likely, keep making small changes in my writing over time so that I can learn to write better and more proficient papers.

Writing Program Evaluator Heather comments:

            Amanda’s essay, “Over Time,” concisely discusses her development as a writer.  The essay is organized in a logical fashion, with each paragraph beginning with a topic sentence that presents the main point of that paragraph.  Throughout the essay, Amanda demonstrates that she possesses a good awareness of the intricacies of the writing process, as well as an awareness of her own writing particularities.  She observes, for example, that having a family member read her essay can help her see what changes she can make. At the end of the paper, she concludes by providing goals for how she will improve her writing during the school year.  The paper reflects Amanda’s ability to assess the way she writes and to adhere to the parameters of the prompt.

Connections:

*To explore the writing self-assessment mode further, see the other February '07 Essays of the Month by John Marsh, Jaimie Toro, and Carlie Westerman.

*After reading all four writing self-assessments, what do you see in common about the way these four writers address this prompt?  What do you see that they do differently in their self-assessments? 

*Amanda writes that getting feedback from family members gives her "a better understanding of how to relate what I feel to others."  Do you ask family members or friends for feedback on your writing before submitting it to the Writing Program?  If not, give it a try; the practice of doing so might give you a whole new perspective on revision!